Falling in love is a magical experience. It’s filled with excitement, butterflies, and a deep desire to make the best impression on the person we adore. In those early stages, we often tweak our behavior, carefully curating how we present ourselves. Something as simple as avoiding lollipops—fearing it may make us seem childish—symbolizes this phase of self-conscious love.
However, as a relationship matures, especially after marriage, things change. The need to impress fades, and the comfort of unconditional acceptance sets in. That once-hidden love for lollipops (or any quirky habit) resurfaces, representing a return to one’s true self.
Why Do We Hide Our True Selves in the Beginning?
When we first start dating, we unknowingly step into a highlight reel version of ourselves. We filter our habits, polish our words, and refine our actions to seem more attractive. But why?
1. The Desire to Impress
At the start of a relationship, we want to be seen in the best light. Whether it’s dressing perfectly, avoiding certain foods, or hiding silly habits, we make an effort to be someone our partner will admire.
2. Fear of Being Judged
We all have quirks—maybe you love collecting action figures, singing off-key in the shower, or eating candy like a child. But in the early stages, there’s a fear that revealing too much too soon could push the other person away.
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3. Society’s Expectations
Romantic relationships, especially new ones, are often shaped by social norms and expectations. Acting “mature” or “refined” seems like the right thing to do, even if it means suppressing natural instincts like enjoying a simple lollipop.
How Marriage Changes Everything
Marriage is not just about love; it’s about comfort, trust, and deep acceptance. Once you’ve committed to each other for life, the need to impress fades, and true personalities begin to shine.
1. The Comfort of Being Yourself
In a long-term relationship, you stop overthinking every action. You no longer worry if eating candy makes you seem childish, if watching cartoons is immature, or if wearing pajamas all day is unattractive. You embrace your true self because you know your partner loves you for who you are, not for the polished version you once presented.
2. Love Shifts from Attraction to Connection
Attraction may have sparked the relationship, but emotional connection sustains it. What makes a marriage strong is genuine companionship, built on shared experiences and authenticity. That means letting your guard down—whether that’s laughing at silly jokes, dancing like no one’s watching, or, yes, eating that lollipop with pride.
3. Unconditional Acceptance
Real love isn’t about impressing; it’s about accepting. Marriage teaches you that your quirks, habits, and imperfections are what make you unique—and those are often the things your partner grows to love the most.
The Evolution of Love: From Perfection to Authenticity
Every relationship goes through stages of transformation. The love that starts with perfection-seeking gradually matures into comfort-driven authenticity.
Stage 1: The “Best Behavior” Phase
In the beginning, you avoid anything that might make you seem less attractive or mature. You wear your best clothes, avoid messy foods, and pretend you don’t binge-watch cartoons.
Stage 2: The Gradual Unveiling
As you get more comfortable, little pieces of the real you start slipping out. Maybe you start eating lollipops in front of your partner, or you admit to loving cheesy romance novels. You test the waters to see if they still find you charming despite your quirks.
Stage 3: The Marriage Comfort Zone
By the time you’re married, there’s no need for facades. You eat what you want, laugh as loudly as you please, and fully embrace your unique personality. Your partner loves you for all of it—including the quirks you once tried to hide.
What This Teaches Us About True Love
1. You Deserve to Be Loved for Who You Are
If you feel the need to hide parts of yourself to keep someone interested, they may not be the right person for you. The right relationship allows you to be yourself from the start.
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2. Authenticity Leads to Deeper Connections
Love isn’t about pretending to be perfect—it’s about being real, raw, and vulnerable. The more you embrace your true self, the stronger your bond will be.
3. The Best Relationships Feel Like Home
In a lasting love story, your partner becomes your safe space—the person with whom you can be 100% yourself. If eating lollipops brings you joy, they won’t just accept it; they’ll probably buy you a lifetime supply.
Final Thoughts: Love is About Being Yourself
At the start of a relationship, it’s natural to want to impress, but true love is about acceptance, not perfection. The shift from hiding small quirks to embracing them openly is a sign of a healthy, growing relationship.
So, if you ever hesitated to eat a lollipop because you were afraid of being judged—go ahead and unwrap it now. If you’re with the right person, they’ll love watching you enjoy it.
Jase and Missy Robertson’s journey: Overcoming obstacles and finding strength
Mia Robertson, the youngest daughter of Duck Dynasty’s Jase & Missy Robertson, has been born with a condition known as cleft lip and palate, a gap in the upper lip that can involve the gum as well.
The U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention shares that about one in every 1,600 babies is born with a cleft lip with a cleft palate in the U.S.
Because of her condition, sweet Mia, who is now 18 years old, has been forced to undergo 13 surgeries, with the 14th taking place just recently. The family truly hopes this would be Mia’s last procedure before her problem is finally solved.
Throughout every surgery, the young girl remains positive. What’s most, she hopes she serves as inspiration for other young children who are born with the same condition. On her own initiative and with the help of her family, Mia established the Mia Moo Fund in order to assist in making certain that each and every child wears a smile on their face.
“One of the functions of the Mia Moo Fund is to spread awareness of the cleft lip and palate journey,” Missy Robertson told Christian Post. “The other one is to help with medical funds for the parents and the families living right here in America.”
On his podcast Unashamed, Jase Robertson shared an update on Mia’s condition and said that his daughter is recovering well.
“She’s doing great. She’s turned a corner,” he said, and then added, “Everything seems great, seems to be fine.”
“Surgery went a little longer than expected, but she is home and recovering,” the loving father told his podcast listeners. “Thank you for praying for her and for our family. She is a champion!”
Before the surgery took place, Missy spoke of her daughter’s condition and explained that she had been constantly asked about the number of procedures Mia would need to undergo in the future. “There is never any other response than ‘We just don’t know,’” Missy said. She then added that they rely on God for assistance. “Since she is 18 now, she is taking the lead in all the discussions and medical forms. It’s been a little strange,” Missy wrote. “But it’s just another reminder to lean on the Lord and that I’m not in control.”
Mia also hopes that she’s at “the finish line.”
“Hopefully the last time I’ll see my doctors in this setting! It’s been a long road but we are at the finish line,” brave Mia said.
The Robertson’s have also been preparing for a new addition to the family as they open the doors to their hearts and home for a child whose mother was unfit to take care of.
We wish Mia speedy recovery.
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