The weight of the betrayal settled in my stomach like a cold stone. Three years. Three years of sacrifice, of pinching pennies and foregoing simple pleasures, all for a car that would keep our family safe. And he’d squandered it. On a whim. On a trip to Paris for his mother.
David, bless his oblivious heart, seemed genuinely surprised by my reaction. He’d always been a mama’s boy, and I’d tolerated it, even indulged it, to a point. But this? This was beyond the pale.
“It’s my money too!” he’d protested, his voice rising in that familiar defensive tone. “She deserves it! You can’t put a price on gratitude.”
I’d simply stared at him, my mind reeling. Gratitude? What about gratitude for the sacrifices I’d made, for the countless hours I’d spent juggling work, kids, and household chores? What about gratitude for the safety of our children?
I knew arguing would be futile. He was locked in his own world of justifications, and I wasn’t about to waste my breath. Instead, I retreated, a quiet fury simmering beneath my composed exterior.
Over the next few days, I played the part of the understanding wife. I smiled, nodded, and even helped him pack his mother’s suitcase. I listened patiently as he recounted his mother’s excited phone calls, her plans for sightseeing and shopping.
But beneath the surface, I was plotting. I was determined to teach him a lesson about finances, about responsibility, about the true meaning of family.
First, I contacted his mother. I explained the situation, the crumbling van, the precarious state of our family finances. She was mortified. She’d always been a sensible woman, and she was appalled by her son’s impulsive decision. She offered to pay for the trip herself, but I declined. Instead, I suggested a compromise. She could still go to Paris, but for a shorter period, a weekend getaway rather than a full week. The difference in cost would be returned to our car fund.
Next, I tackled the issue of David’s “my money too” argument. I opened a joint account, separate from our everyday expenses, and deposited the remaining car fund, along with the money his mother had returned. I then created a detailed budget, outlining our household expenses, including the cost of a new (used) car. I presented it to David, highlighting the glaring discrepancy between our needs and his impulsive spending.
I also introduced him to the concept of “family meetings.” Every Sunday, we would sit down together, discuss our finances, and make joint decisions about spending. The kids were included, too, learning about the value of money and the importance of saving.
Finally, I decided to address the issue of his mother’s constant demands. I didn’t want to create a rift between them, but I needed to establish boundaries. I suggested that we set aside a small portion of our budget for gifts and experiences for both our families, to be agreed upon by both of us.
The changes weren’t immediate. David grumbled about the budget, about the “unnecessary” family meetings. But slowly, he began to understand. He started to appreciate the sacrifices I’d made, the careful planning that kept our family afloat. He even started to enjoy the family meetings, seeing them as an opportunity to connect with the kids and make joint decisions.
The day we drove our newly purchased (used) car home, David looked at me, his eyes filled with a mixture of regret and gratitude. “Thank you,” he said, his voice sincere. “For teaching me.”
I smiled. “We’re a team, David,” I said. “And teams work together.”
Our thoughts and prayers go out to Jennifer Garner for her tragic loss
Jennifer Garner has had a successful career in Hollywood, but she has also stayed close to her parents.
The actress wrote on social media on Monday that her dad had died. He was 85 years old.
William John Garner was Jennifer Gardner’s dad. Who was he?
KBTX News 3 says that William John “Billy” Garner went to Texas A&M University and got his Bachelor of Chemical Engineering in 1961 and his Master of Chemical Engineering in 1976.
Stephen Garner was the dad of Jennifer Garner, Susannah Kay Garner Carpenter, and Melissa Garner Wylie.
Pat Garner, their mother, was his wife for almost 60 years.Jennifer wrote a blog post on January 1, 2024, to celebrate her parents’ 59th wedding anniversary.
“Happy 59th wedding anniversary to my loving and sweet parents!” “Thank you, Mom and Dad, for making sure my sisters and I had a safe and happy childhood,” she wrote.
She was born in Texas and grew up in Charleston, West Virginia.
The Hindustan Times says that William worked for Union Carbide as a chemical engineer.
What killed William John Garner?
“My dad died in peace on Saturday afternoon.” When he left, we were with him and sang “Amazing Grace.” Did we carry him across or scare him away? That’s a good question. “The death of an 85-year-old man who lived a healthy, happy life is not a tragedy, but I know that grief is inevitable and can come up at any time,” she wrote.
“Today is a day to be thankful,” she said.
“We are thankful for Dad’s kind nature and quiet strength.” For the way he teased with a sly grin and made up the part of the all-in, always-patient girl dad. He has a strong work ethic, is a good leader, and has faith.
But Jennifer did say that William was treated at Charleston Area Medical Center and City of Hope. She did not say what killed William.
“We want to thank the medical staff at Charleston Area Medical Center and City of Hope.” Your care made Dad’s life longer and gave him more time to do the things he loved, like being with his daughters and grandchildren, cheering for his beloved Aggies, being in charge of a boat, and most of all, being next to our mom, his wife of 59 years.
My sisters and I will never get tired of talking about how great my dad was, so please bear with us. For now, I’m sharing these memories to show how grateful I am for the kind and smart man, father, and grandfather he was, as well as the loving legacy he left behind.
Patricia Ann Garner is Jennifer Garner’s mom. Who is she?
Southern Living talked to Patricia about her family history. She grew up on a farm near Locust Grove, Oklahoma.
Harvey Newton English and Violet Margaret Sayre English bought the farm in 1936, during the Great Depression. Patricia was born in 1938, two years after her mum and dad moved there.
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