During my childhood and teenage years, I felt the weight of my father’s strict expectations. Instead of being supportive, he focused on control. His voice often echoed in my mind, reminding me of his “random checks” of my room and school bags, which felt more like an interrogation than genuine concern.
His high standards didn’t just apply at home; they spilled into my school life too. He insisted that I must earn at least a B in every subject, always pushing me to do better. This constant pressure built up a lot of anxiety in me and drove me to succeed, but mostly out of fear rather than passion.
As I got older, I became determined to break free from his tight grip, especially when it came to my college education. I decided to fund my own schooling, so my father couldn’t use financial control against me. In contrast, my cousin had a much different experience. His parents, my aunt and uncle, were involved in his life but respected his independence. They supported his education without making him feel pressured. This difference in our upbringings made me acutely aware of the heavy burden I carried.
When I graduated from high school, I made the choice to pay for my college myself. I took on part-time jobs and student loans, accepting the debt rather than risking my father’s influence over me. Interestingly, during this time, my father never offered financial help. He seemed unconcerned about my struggles, yet he painted a different picture to others.
He liked to present himself as the supportive dad who was investing in my future. At social gatherings, he would boast about how much he was contributing to my education, enjoying the praise he received for being a caring father. This false story was something he maintained without a hint of shame.
This charade continued until one summer evening at a family barbecue. During a relaxed conversation, my uncle, unaware of the truth, asked my father how much my education was costing him. Without hesitation, my father responded with pride, claiming it was a significant investment for my future.
Hearing this blatant lie ignited a fire in me. I knew I couldn’t let this continue. While I didn’t confront him then, I began planning how to reveal the truth in a way that left no doubt about my actual journey through college. I waited for graduation day, knowing it would be the perfect time to set the record straight. I invited my family, including my father, making sure they would all be there for what I had planned.
On graduation day, I felt a mix of nerves and determination. As I prepared to speak, I understood the weight of this moment. It represented not just my academic achievement but also a personal declaration. When it was my turn, I approached the podium, heart racing. The audience quieted, and I began: “Today, I want to thank the person who truly made this possible… myself. I financed my college education through hard work, determination, and countless hours of part-time jobs”.
The reaction was immediate. Gasps and murmurs filled the room as images of my college experience appeared on the screen behind me, pictures of late nights studying, work schedules, and tuition checks, all from my own earnings.
“Every dollar I earned and every exam I passed was done without any financial aid from my father”, I continued, glancing at my father’s shocked expression. The atmosphere shifted as my words sank in. The images contrasted sharply with my father’s claims, creating a powerful moment of personal vindication and public clarification.
After the ceremony, family reactions varied. Some were surprised, while others admired my independence. My aunt approached me, looking regretful. “We had no idea you did this all on your own”, she said, her tone apologetic. I wasn’t seeking sympathy but rather acknowledgment of my hard work. This recognition was more fulfilling than any comforting words could offer.
Later, my uncle, clapping me on the back, remarked with respect: “You really showed him. You took control and told the truth”. “Yes, I suppose I did”, I replied, feeling a sense of freedom that went beyond just graduating. “But more importantly, I showed myself what I’m capable of.”
That day marked the end of my college journey and the beginning of a new chapter in my life, free from my father’s oppressive expectations. I had proven to myself and others that I could face significant challenges on my own terms.
My experience in college, funded by my hard work, was a testament to resilience and self-reliance. Standing there with my peers and family, I knew that exciting new adventures awaited me, filled with the promise of freedom and the thrill of self-determination. I walked away not just with a diploma but with a deep understanding of my own strength and capability.
He is a legendary musician, and we have all sung his songs, but he is currently ill and in suffering.
The renowned Genesis lead singer and drummer Phil Collins has enjoyed enormous success in the music business over his illustrious career.
Joining Michael Jackson and Paul McCartney as the only performers with over 100 million records sold through both solo and collaborative projects, he is one of three. Collins was exposed to music at a young age. He was born on January 30, 1951, in London, England, to parents who were artists.
The move that would define his sound came when he was five years old and received a homemade drum kit from his uncle. It included tambourines, triangles, cymbals, and miniature drums.
Key bands like The Shadows led the way as the English beat genre started to take shape. In addition to leading this movement, Collins would frequently perform at get-togethers thrown by his parents’ sailing club.
Collins was first exposed to rock and roll at the age of fourteen, when The Beatles motivated him to buy a record player and Please Please Me. He would put his drums in front of a mirror and turn up the record player’s volume so he wouldn’t have to look at what he was doing.
To learn how to read drum music, which was necessary if one wished to work in an orchestra pit or dance band, he decided to take drum lessons from a teacher. But Collins soon discovered that reading sheet music was not nearly as good as playing spontaneously.
In the 1970s, Collin’s life took an unexpected turn after he came upon an advertisement for Genesis’ drummer. Collins got in touch with them, and they were happy to have him on board, which launched his incredible musical career.
Many of the songs from The Beatles’ five albums went on to become timeless classics that we still love to this day. Due to a dearth of worthy contenders, Collins assumed the role of lead vocalist for the band quite quickly.
He took a while to get used to being a drummer as well as a voice, but he persisted and became one of the greatest musicians of our time.
As a solo artist and a member of the legendary band Genesis, Collins enjoyed enormous success in the music industry. Hits like “I Don’t Care Anymore,” “In The Air Tonight,” and “You Can’t Hurry Love” propelled him to the top of the music business.
After 25 years with Genesis, Collins made the decision to change directions in his career, concentrating on jazz ventures, movie soundtracks, and his solo endeavors. He said he hoped his old comrades would have a successful career, but when 2017 came around, he decided to go back on the road with them for their Last Domino tour.
Sadly, the pandemic forced a postponement of this tour, and shortly before it started, Phil spoke with BBC Breakfast, raising some concerns regarding his health. With Phil on vocals and Nicholas Collins on drums, the band plans to play live again despite this setback.
Nic is a fantastic drummer, but according to Tony Banks, he could add even more intensity to the already strong early Phil Collins tunes.
Speaking on his retirement from drumming, Phil remarked, “I’d like to, but I can scarcely grip a stick with this hand.” Despite the challenges that come with being physically limited, Phil has not allowed them to deter him from pursuing his love of music.
The storyteller, a man our age, spoke with a palpable sense of loss as he outlined his physical struggles. He bemoaned not being able to travel with his kid and hear about his travels.
He wasn’t sure if he wanted to carry on traveling because of his health. His remarks gave off a dejected vibe, as though he had accepted that he could no longer engage in some activities and that they were off-limits to him.
He felt pressured and faced with a difficult decision: stick on his current course or stop his travels. It dawned on him that either way, a physical constraint or a deliberate choice would force him to give up something he valued. He was troubled by this and felt as though he might miss out on a lot of opportunities in life as a result of this sudden change in his circumstances.
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